Random Rantings #1

Random Rantings is a series of short thoughts that aren’t long enough to be full columns but are too long to be tweets. The plan is to do between five and ten topics per random rantings post. This posts topics include: The Philadelphia Flyers, Transformers 3, NBA Lockout, Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest, and more. Enjoy

*Transformers 3 was better than Transformers 2 but not as good as Transformers 1. Take that how you will. My biggest problem with all of these Transformers movies is that they could all be their own entity rather than a trilogy of movies. Maybe that’s the way Michael Bay planned it but that’s some pretty terrible planning on his part. I realize that Bay expects people to forget what happened two minutes ago so remembering what happened two years ago should be long out of their brain but not everyone is a complete moron. The worst part about it all is that “GREAT STORYTELLING!” is part of the review trailer, like Bay is trying to justify his nonsensical plot by having it mentioned on TV every commercial break. I only have myself to blame for watching the movie and knowing what to expect. I don’t regret watching it because I didn’t pay for it and I like to stay up on the current movies. But this movie cost 270 million dollars to make, would it have killed them to spend $100 on a continuity editor? Hell, I would have worked for a kiss on the cheek from Rosie Huntington-Whiteley.

*On the subject of robots, earlier this year I saw a trailer for a movie called Real Steel. If you haven’t seen this trailer the best way to describe it is either Transformers meets The Fighter or the origin of Rock Em Sock Em Robots. It looks like a completely unnecessary movie but yet I’ll go see it because, again, I like to keep up on current movies, and I guarantee that the story will actually make sense.

*Two seasons ago the Philadelphia Flyers were two games away from winning the Stanley Cup. Last season they were the 2nd best team in the East during the season and lost in the Playoffs to the eventual Stanley Cup Champion Boston Bruins. So obviously the best thing to do would be to add a piece or two and make another run at things, right? Not if you’re the Flyers. They’ve gotten rid of what seems like 3/4ths of their team from last season, including key players like their captain Mike Richards and their leading goal scorer Jeff Carter. College students have no doubt heard of the term “trash can alcohol.” It’s where you throw any random alcohol in to a trash can and force some freshman to drink it. That’s what the Flyers management appears to be doing this year. They’re putting together random players (the alcohol) regardless of the chemistry (how it tastes) and telling fans, “We don’t know if we’ll win or not (if it’ll be good) but we’ll definitely be in the headlines (get you drunk).” And the end result will either be the team winning (the alcohol staying down) and the fans celebrating (the freshman being accepted) or the team losing (the alcohol coming up) and the fans being pissed off (the freshman never hanging out with those guys again). So drink up Philadelphia, drink up.

*If you go to NBA.com and browse around, you won’t find many pictures of current players. In fact, if you click on a player page, instead of a picture of the player, you’ll see a picture of the team logo. This of couse is because of the NBA lockout and it’s one of the pettiest things I’ve ever seen. I don’t care which group of millionaires wants more money, as a fan, I just want to know you care about me. By turning the official league web site into an angelfire middle school project, you’re showing that you don’t care. The league should be doing everything they can to get the fans on their side. They should be posting videos, having contests, coming up with games, something, anything. We’re already on the side of the players and as long as they just keep saying, “Wish I could entertain you guys on the court tonight. Sorry.” then we’re going to stay on their side because we know who they are but we don’t know a bunch of suits. Players just need to avoid going all Reggie Bush on us and they’ll be fine. The suits on the other hand need to work extra hard to make us feel important. Start by making sure the season starts on time.

*I love the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest. On Fourth of July some people like grilling out, some like drinking beer, some like fireworks, and some like making American’s look worse in the eyes of the rest of the world by going over the top with their patriotism but I love watching guys stuff hot dogs and buns in their mouth for 10 minutes and try not to throw up. The only disappointing thing about the event the past two years is that Kobayashi hasn’t competed due to a contract dispute. Seriously? A contract dispute over eating? The IFOCE needs to get their stuff together and pay Kobayashi his money because the sport wouldn’t be where it’s at without him. And who knows, if they can get Kobayashi back under contract, with the NBA and NFL currently in a lock out, maybe IFOCE can step up and get the national sports media attention that it deserves.

*I applaud the San Jose Sharks for making moves. AT the NHL Draft they traded scorer Devin Setoguchi for defenseman Brent Burns, then they signed two-way forward Michal Handzus, and just the other day they traded scorer Dany Heatley for fellow scorer Martin Havlat. The Sharks have been one of the best teams in the NHL for a few years now but every time they get in the playoffs, they always fail to reach the Final. This off-season they’ve made major, but logical moves, to better their team. They haven’t completely changed their core, like the Flyers, but they also haven’t stood pat, like the Vancouver Canucks, and that’s what I like to see from a great team trying to be a championship team.

*ESPN Insider is the dumbest thing I’ve ever come across on the internet. The fact that they want you to pay for content that should be free is an absolute joke. For example, almost all of the semi-decent hockey content on ESPN.com is labeled “ESPN Insider.” Hey ESPN, maybe if you made your hockey content free, hockey fans would actually start going to your website for news and opinions. Instead you continue to neglect them by trying to get them to pay for content that isn’t really “insider” knowledge because everyone knows that ESPN doesn’t have any insight when it comes to the NHL. I don’t mind paying for content if it’s actually worth paying for and they deliver insight that I can’t get anywhere else. My biggest problem with ESPN Insider is that they shove it in your face. You want to dedicate a sub-site to your insider subscribers? Fine. But don’t have a top headline unavailable to me and others because we refuse to give you more money on top of the billions you already make. The only thing that could make ESPN Insider worse is if they added Rick Reilly‘s terrible columns as part of their content line up and people actually had to pay to read them. And for the record, I’ve only skimmed two, maybe three, Reilly columns during his entire ESPN tenure and none of them were funny nor informative.


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